


It Must be Heaven's Light

by NebulaEyes



Category: Good Omens (TV), Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett
Genre: 6000 Years of Pining (Good Omens), Caring Aziraphale (Good Omens), Crowley Was Raphael Before He Fell (Good Omens), Emotional Crowley (Good Omens), First Kiss, Fluff, I'm Bad At Summaries, I'm Bad At Tagging, Idiots in Love, Ineffable Husbands (Good Omens), Ineffable Idiots (Good Omens), Love Confessions, M/M, POV Aziraphale (Good Omens), Romance, Singing, Song Lyrics, The Author Regrets Nothing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-25
Updated: 2019-08-25
Packaged: 2020-09-26 16:43:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,658
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20392879
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NebulaEyes/pseuds/NebulaEyes
Summary: After the Ritz, Crowley and Aziraphale go back to Crowley's flat, but because of the joy and stress of everything they decide to part for the night. Aziraphale leaves, but then realizes he accidentally left his book in Crowley's room during their body swap. When he goes back to retrieve it, he hears something he never expected to, and learns things he never thought or dared to hope to learn. What will happen when Crowley catches him listening just outside the door?





	It Must be Heaven's Light

**Author's Note:**

> SONG: Heaven's Light from Disney's Hunchback of Notre Dame  
No copyright intended. I do not own the song, the lyrics, or the movie it's from.  
Thank you, have a nice read and nice (whatever time of day it is for you)
> 
> Enjoy! :3

"Oh! Thank you for that lovely meal at the Ritz." I thanked Crowley as we made it back to his flat from a night of celebration. We had fooled Heaven and Hell, and they would FINALLY leave us alone. We were free. That alone opened up a whole new world I never thought I would get to see. The wily serpent with his gorgeous eyes that I fell in love with on the wall, his smile that could brighten a room, and his voice that could sooth the tired, the old, or the young, or perhaps tempt someone into something with mere suggestions. I hadn't known it until 1941 when I held a demonically miracled book bag, that I truly HAD been in love with him since Eden. It made me go through the years, and with every second of recollection, I felt my heart, my grace, my soul, and my knees grow weak in all the best ways. It was a love I had never known.

When we finally walked into the flat, I heard Crowley give a low chuckle, the kind that always warmed my heart, but at the same time, it forced an ache there as well, because although I love him so much, I know he couldn't possibly love me that way. Not after everything I've put him through. I've CONSTANTLY reminded him that we're an angel and a demon...that he's fallen, and really there was no need for me to such a thing, but I always did anyway. I did it whenever his words would get too fond, when he would say we had something in common. It was almost like an instinct. Then, I did possibly the worst thing ever. Something I was almost certain not even God could forgive. At the Bandstand I had told him that I didn't like him, that there was no 'our side', not anymore, and I told him that it was over. I lied to him, and told him I wouldn't tell him where the Antichrist was, even though averting the Apocalypse had been his idea entirely. Looking back on the bandstand constricted my heart in such a way, it was nearly a physical pain. "Don't worry about it, Aziraphale. You did say back in the late '60's that we should go to the Ritz, and so we have. I mean...we have before, but this was a celebration."

Oh, how the poets and the authors were wrong. My heart didn't shatter, nor did it break, nor did it crumble. It was engulfed in slow torturous hellfire as I remembered the guilt from then as well, which then caused me to remember other past guilt's, but now was not the time for that. We are free now. "You're right. So, what are we doing here?"

"Well, I..." He stopped once he reached the door to his office, or as I like to silently refer to as his throne room, he was reaching for the door, but lowered his hand almost immediately. "...hey, Angel?"

"Yes, Crowley?"

"We're really free...aren't we?" I knew the sound of a choked sob when I heard one. I swiftly made my way in front of him and carefully took his glasses off. Looking into his golden eyes as tears spilled from them. "I-I must seem so fucking weak at the moment..." He sniffed. "...but I don't think I could even stop them if I tried. The tears. I just...they...they're not going to hurt you. They...if you're seen with me...they're not going to...not anymore, and I..."

I shook my head just slightly as I brought my hands up to the sides of his face, wiping his tears away with my thumbs, giving him an honest and loving smile without meaning to, but once it was on my face, I couldn't get rid of it. "I don't understand why you're worrying about me, but you're right. They're not going to come after me or you. We gave them a right scare. Terrified them, even. Now, I think we've celebrated enough today. We have many more days ahead, Crowley. Let's celebrate again tomorrow. Okay?"

He nodded his head with a weak smiled as he hesitantly and gently grabbed my wrists lowering them. "You're right. I'll um...I need some sleep."

For some reason the sleep part felt like a lie, but I felt something strange and warm coming off of him. I've felt it before, but not as often as one might think. Perhaps it was joy. Perhaps it was a sense of freedom. Well, either way, I'll give him the space he needs. "Very well then." I nodded my head as I walked away. "Goodnight, Crowley."

"Goodnight, Aziraphale." He smiled at me, and with his glasses on the floor, because I had apparently dropped them, there was something else in his eyes. Something I had seen long before he had started to wear sunglasses, but I couldn't pin a name to it, so I wasn't going to bother. I walked out of the door, and closed it behind me. I stood there for a moment, thinking I left something in there, but couldn't quite remember what.

Choosing not to dwell on it, I made my way towards the elevator, but then I remembered. I had miracled a book to read last night while Crowley was gone and in my body. I need to grab it. I walked back to the door, slowly turned the handle, realizing it was unlocked, but it wasn't a cause of alarm. I was just there. _'I'll just grab it and leave him be until tomorrow.' _I quietly shut the door behind me, and as I made my way to the door of Crowley's room, I started to hear music coming from it. For some reason there was a small voice in the back of my head telling me to wait an listen. That it was important to listen for the moment. So, I did. However, what I heard next, nearly had me staggering to the wall, was something I never expected to hear ever again. Especially since he was thought to be dead. It was the Archangel Raphael's singing voice, and he seemed to be singing to an instrumental song, or perhaps it had lyrics originally, but the music was just the instrumental part of it. Either way, it was his voice and he was humming along with the instruments. However, realizing it was Raphael's voice wasn't the staggering part. It was the fact that it was also unmistakably Crowley. Something in my grace knew that. So, as he started to sing words to the instruments, I listened with a heavy and pounding heart. Something told me to pay close attention to the lyrics as well, so I did.

So many times out there  
I've watched a happy pair  
Of lovers walking in the night  
They had a kind of glow around them  
It almost looked like Heaven's light

I knew I'd never know  
That warm and loving glow  
Though I might wish with all my might  
No face as hideous as my face  
Was ever meant for Heaven's light

But suddenly an angel has smiled at me  
And touched my face without a trace of fright  
I dare to dream that she  
Might even care for me  
And as I ring the bells tonight  
My cold dark tower seems so bright  
I swear it must be Heaven's Light

Oh, God, there aren't words to describe the way his voice made me feel, how powerful it was, and how every note, every word, somehow held so much more emotion than the last. It was as if his very voice was physically weaving emotion in the air and sending it my way, because as my legs became incredibly shaky, and my heart nearly stopped, I felt love coming off of him like a supernova, longing as big as the ocean, desperation as deep as the universe, and Joy as powerful as a blessing straight from God Herself. The lyrics alone brought tears to my eyes along with the emotion, because as he sang it once more, still not knowing I was here, I could hear every ounce of truth that he honestly felt. We've lived so long, it was hard NOT to see a couple practically glowing, he honestly believed he could never know the glow of love, but he truly wanted to. He wanted to be loved, but...by me as the next part proved. I had smiled at him, and there was the time at Eden that I hovered my wing over him, but just moments ago, I had wiped away his tears, smiling at him. His cold dark tower would obviously mean his flat...and...the fact that after everything, and the fact that he was crying joyful tears that we were free...he felt Heaven's light coming off of me, or at least he genuinely believed he felt like one is supposed to in Heaven's light, which is loved, cared for, wanted, warm, happy, protected and bright.

I felt ALL OF THAT coming off of him, practically knocking me over, but the other thing that kept nagging at me, which was minor at the moment, was the fact that after hearing his voice, I don't have a doubt in my mind that he was once the Archangel Raphael. The Archangel I had actually begun to love romantically as I assisted him, God, Gabriel, and a few other Principalities create the universe. I loved hearing him sing them to life and color, and place them with his wings and masterful yet graceful flying skills. Always singing, and it was wonderful. When I thought he had truly died, I was broken hearted, and God stopped time on Earth so that she could get everything RE-ready for the humans, because the others fell before they were created. So, she had to start over which took about a year...in Heaven. Time on Earth wasn't resumed until AFTER She started to create the humans. Either way, I had time to grieve and heal, and then I met Crowley on the wall, but apparently they were both the same person, and I felt as if my heart and soul were experiencing whiplash ON TOP OF all of the feelings I was gaining from him singing that song!

However, my feelings were quickly morphed in with a sudden twist of cold guilt as Crowley opened his bedroom door to see me standing outside of it, and his jaw dropped while his eyes widened. "A-A-Aziraphale?! I-I thought you...h-how long!?"

"S-Since you started singing." I stuttered out, completely impressed I was even able to get a syllable out. "I...I heard you singing t-twice."

"S-So you heard." He swallowed what seemed to be a big lump in his throat, causing me to just nod in response. "I...did you...feel...?"

"Yes." I croaked as well as squeaked out. I didn't know it was possible but there it was.

"So now you know that I-"

The nervousness and damn near fear in his eyes was driving the guilt that was swirling in my chest, insane. So, I did the only thing I could think of to do. I grabbed his silk black nightshirt with both hands, and tugged him down to me so that I could kiss him. Unfortunately that might've been a bad idea, because the feeling of his lips on mine nearly caused me to collapse. It was warm, loving, passionate, and remarkable. As I let out a moan unwillingly when he wrapped his arms around me with a moan of his own, I gasped, apparently allowing his tongue into my mouth, causing him to need to hold me up and tighter to his body. The overwhelming sense of love that was coming off of him felt so much like home, I wondered why I ever called Heaven home, or even my bookshop. It made no sense when being in his arms felt like everything I had ever needed and ever wanted. We both separated from the kiss, panting and smiling. "I-I love you." I breathed out before I wouldn't have the ability to anymore, because my knees were truly about to give.

Somehow sensing this, Crowley helped lower us to the floor, and once there, gave me a quick, gentle, and chaste kiss on the lips. "Oh, Aziraphale...I've loved you since the beginning of time. Since Heaven. I just...I never thought that...I mean...I'm a demon, and even in Heaven I was..."

"You were...Archangel Raphael."

He blinked at me in shock as his jaw dropped. "How did you know?"

"Oh, I was with all of you creating the stars and nebulae. I would stop everything, even while standing right next to God, just to listen to you sing. I fell in love with you twice. Once in Heaven, but then everyone thought you had died in the war...then I unwittingly fell in love with you again on the wall of Eden."

"W-Wow..." He giggled out. "...I..." He started crying again, so I quickly started to gently kiss him, wrapping my arms around him, focusing on sending all of my love to him. As much as he could stand, as much as I was able, and as much as God was willing to allow me to give before I had to rely on just the barest of it for myself. When I released the kiss, I wiped his tears just before putting my forehead against his, smiling brighter than I ever had before, due to the amount of pure and unrelenting joy I was feeling.

"We have a lot to make up for, my dear. Care to do it together?" I asked him as I leaned back, my heart, soul, and grace telling me this was something good, something loving, and something that somehow, I knew even God would want at this point. I didn't know how I knew that, but I wasn't going to complain. I took my ring off my pinky finger and slid it onto his ring finger on his left hand. "It doesn't have to be in a church, probably a garden..." I held his hand in mine, gently brushing my thumbs on the back of his hand. "...but would you please marry me, Crowley. Former Archangel Raphael?" I looked up to meet his eyes, and mine widened at what I saw there. There was disbelief, love, hope, wonder, awe, and I could tell that he was thinking perhaps this was all a dream. One he didn't want to wake up from. "I don't want to spend another second without you. I was terrified when you went to Heaven, and I've been terrified for the past six thousand years that Heaven or Hell would see one of us with the other. I'm not scared anymore. I can't promise you a lot, but I can certainly promise you that I'll love you until everything we know ceases to exist. If you'll have me. Oh, Crowley, please say you'll marry me."

He didn't answer right away, but when he eventually did, he surprised me to the point of breathlessness and speechlessness as he swallowed thickly and looked up with a reverent look in his eyes, his body relenting with pure faith and joy pouring off of it. "God...I have no idea wh-what I did to deserve this, but thank you! Thank you so much!" He slowly lowered his head and then nodded. "Yes, I'll marry you."

"Oh, thank God!"

"I just did." He chuckled before pulling me into another kiss, and here I thought that after the world didn't end THAT was the first day of the rest of our lives, but no, it was this one. Both of us somehow feeling Heaven's Light in each other's arms, and would do so for the rest of eternity.

**Author's Note:**

> The thought came to me, I played the song the entire time writing this, and now it's here. Literally wrote it in about thirty minutes. Let me know what you think :3 Thanks!


End file.
